Surprise!

When I was having sex with R last week I was having a great, power-exchange-free time. We were both focused on having fun. While I was above her, she dug her nails into my back. I really enjoyed it, and she saw that and kept it up, progressively digging in more. I got off, convulsing and collapsing onto her. It was wonderful, and I wasn't expecting it. R was absolutely not expecting it, and didn't recognize what had happened until I explained.

"Are you OK?" "Yes." "Are you sure you're OK?" "Yes. That was an orgasm." "Oh . . . "

It was fantastic, and R thought it was really cool too. I love that she is amused by my reactions to things.

Afterwards, I felt incredibly strange, tho. I've never been in subspace without there being a psychological element to the preceding events. Z naturally makes pain a game of control, always toying with me at the same time. And R is in no way a Dom. So it was confusing. My instinct was to melt, to be compliant, to be putty in someone's hands. But I didn't have anyone to direct that to. And the event being early in the evening didn't make it easier, as the only way I really 'reset' is by sleeping. So the rest of the evening was spent alternating between trying to pull myself out of subspace and enjoying the delicious welts on my back.

R asked me if I'd encountered pain that was too much. The answer is not in context, with sufficient warm-up. The only issues I've had have been from something being too abrupt. Even then, I haven't encountered anything that was difficult enough that it needed to stop. Part of that is that if I can't get pleasure from the sensation itself, I still get pleasure from being able to handle it, and from allowing my partner free reign. However, part of it is also that Z can read me amazingly well, and knows exactly how his actions are affecting me.