Questions for Masochists:
Q: Can you climax from pain?
A: Yes, specifically from nipple torture or a combination of biting and choking. It is a wonderful feeling. However, it leaves me desperate for sexual contact rather than feeling satisfied.
Q: Can you self-inflict pain?
A: As a recovering cutter, I can absolutely inflict my own pain. I use my fingernails or, rarely now, razor blades. However, self-inflicted pain is a very different experience. Receiving pain from my partner is about ceding control. Self-inflicted pain, on the other hand, is (for me) about asserting control over my body. The important overlap is that either way, I’m making sure someone is in control. I have chronic joint pain and migraine headaches, so I usually feel like my body has a mind of its own. The appeal in nice, sharp, deliberate pain is that my body is being taken control of. I enjoy that regardless of whether it is me or a partner.
Q: Is all pain good?
A: No. There is no one that I've met or heard of who likes to stub their toe, or get a headache. I like sharp, deliberate pain.
Questions for bklnbombshell's Research on Masochism:
Q: When you think of pain, what first comes to mind?
A: Sex.
Q: Was there a specific moment in your life that you discovered pain to be pleasurable? What was it? How did you feel about it?
A: I remember first learning what the word masochism meant and going "Yay! There's a word for it! Which implies I'm not the only person who feels this way." I don't remember a specific revelation before that, but it came right along with my first interest in sex.
Q: Do you associate more with being a masochist, a sadist, or both equally? What is it about masochism or sadism that you find so arousing?
A: I identify as a masochist before any other aspect of my sexuality. I love ceding control to someone else. I love sharp, deliberate pain, and to me that isn't at all negative. If there isn't enough warm-up and I have trouble taking it then it just feels like a challenge. In that case I get pleasure out of being pushed out of my comfort zone and out of giving someone else the control to go as far as they want, even when it's not easy for me.
Q: If you are a masochist, have you ever felt sadistic tendencies during sex? Did you act upon them? What was your experience?
A: I switch with my partner, and I have been finding a bit of a sadistic streak, which I am free to - encouraged to - exhibit at will. I like the idea of pushing him farther than he's been before. This is especially evident with breathplay lately, as it's something we both love being on either end of.
Q: If you associate more with masochism, are there moments in your life (outside sexual experiences) where you have sadistic thoughts? If you associate more with sadism, do you have masochistic thoughts?
A: I only notice sadistic thoughts within or while planning a sexual encounter that I will be in charge of.
Q: Do you believe you truly enjoy pain, or is it what the pain symbolizes: a form of humiliation and domination by a more "powerful" person?
A: I truly enjoy pain. I have orgasmed from pain alone, and one of those times was purely sensation. The girl I was with has no interest in domination and there was no psychological aspect. She started digging her nails into my back, saw I liked it, kept going, and was very surprised and confused when I got off.
Q: Have you become aroused from pain outside of a sexual experience? When and where? How did you react?
A: I have enjoyed pain outside a sexual context, but I don't know if aroused is an accurate description. I am a recovering cutter, and I love the way that feels. I love sharp pain. At first I'm sure I felt like a freak, but I now am completely OK with it: it's the way I'm wired.
Q: Do you need pain to orgasm, or to become aroused? Would you be willing to have a relationship with a partner who was unwilling to inflict pain upon you? (Is it a "deal breaker"?)
A: I don't need pain to be a part of every sexual encounter. I had a long term relationship with someone that treated me like a china-doll in bed, and I managed to block out how much I missed pain. However, I would never do it again.
Q: Do you have a "pain threshold"? Is there a kind of pain (or instrument to inflict pain) that you wish to experience?
A: I have not yet found a pain level that I can't enjoy with enough work-up. I would love to be on the receiving end of a single-tail whip, as it's sharp, it stings, and it's powerful: right up my alley.
A: I remember first learning what the word masochism meant and going "Yay! There's a word for it! Which implies I'm not the only person who feels this way." I don't remember a specific revelation before that, but it came right along with my first interest in sex.
Q: Do you associate more with being a masochist, a sadist, or both equally? What is it about masochism or sadism that you find so arousing?
A: I identify as a masochist before any other aspect of my sexuality. I love ceding control to someone else. I love sharp, deliberate pain, and to me that isn't at all negative. If there isn't enough warm-up and I have trouble taking it then it just feels like a challenge. In that case I get pleasure out of being pushed out of my comfort zone and out of giving someone else the control to go as far as they want, even when it's not easy for me.
Q: If you are a masochist, have you ever felt sadistic tendencies during sex? Did you act upon them? What was your experience?
A: I switch with my partner, and I have been finding a bit of a sadistic streak, which I am free to - encouraged to - exhibit at will. I like the idea of pushing him farther than he's been before. This is especially evident with breathplay lately, as it's something we both love being on either end of.
Q: If you associate more with masochism, are there moments in your life (outside sexual experiences) where you have sadistic thoughts? If you associate more with sadism, do you have masochistic thoughts?
A: I only notice sadistic thoughts within or while planning a sexual encounter that I will be in charge of.
Q: Do you believe you truly enjoy pain, or is it what the pain symbolizes: a form of humiliation and domination by a more "powerful" person?
A: I truly enjoy pain. I have orgasmed from pain alone, and one of those times was purely sensation. The girl I was with has no interest in domination and there was no psychological aspect. She started digging her nails into my back, saw I liked it, kept going, and was very surprised and confused when I got off.
Q: Have you become aroused from pain outside of a sexual experience? When and where? How did you react?
A: I have enjoyed pain outside a sexual context, but I don't know if aroused is an accurate description. I am a recovering cutter, and I love the way that feels. I love sharp pain. At first I'm sure I felt like a freak, but I now am completely OK with it: it's the way I'm wired.
Q: Do you need pain to orgasm, or to become aroused? Would you be willing to have a relationship with a partner who was unwilling to inflict pain upon you? (Is it a "deal breaker"?)
A: I don't need pain to be a part of every sexual encounter. I had a long term relationship with someone that treated me like a china-doll in bed, and I managed to block out how much I missed pain. However, I would never do it again.
Q: Do you have a "pain threshold"? Is there a kind of pain (or instrument to inflict pain) that you wish to experience?
A: I have not yet found a pain level that I can't enjoy with enough work-up. I would love to be on the receiving end of a single-tail whip, as it's sharp, it stings, and it's powerful: right up my alley.
